Fabulous mood!

I've been experiencing a lot of positive changes recently! I went back for another yoga session today, and I just feel so much more gratuitous every time I go to a yoga class. I still have a problem with bashing myself for not being able to do the poses right, but in the moment, I understand that yoga is about doing what's best for you and it's not about pushing yourself too hard. The people around me care if I hurt myself, for a variety of reasons, and I'd certainly care if I hurt myself. And how I handle my yoga is definitely how I should handle my life. Do myself the better service of pushing myself and having new experiences and testing my limits, but not going out of my way to overexert myself in ways I know will be detrimental. But also, be determined and consistent.

I ran into a friend I haven't seen in person in over 6 months! That friend was able to pick me up off the ground in a hug, and that's not something I think that they would have been able to do over 6 months ago. It really made me think about where I am and where I want to be with my own physical stature. The friend did admit that they had to make some sacrifices to get to where they are, or at least for it to show. That friend is a bike mechanic so surely they would gain some strength in the line at work, but for it to show as well as it does means that they had to cut the carbs. I love carbohydrates! I just couldn't see my life without them, but I can also stand to take in more protein. I don't watch what I eat, and I've decided to dramatically decrease my meat intake. Even if I don't cut back on the carbs, I still need to pick up on the protein to be able to stay standing.

I also went into a sauna, for the first time! It felt so good to sweat in dry heat! Walking back out into the air-conditioned locker room was painfully invigorating!

Over the past few days, I had my very first Couchsurfing guest! For the first time, I was on the other side of the experience, and it was amazing! I'm very fortunate that my first guest was enthusiastic about being in the area! I'm also very fortunate that I have roommates and a lot of friends to help me entertain! And a huge bonus for this guest also having hosted people, so I could get more feedback on that part of the experience and have better Insight on where I want to be with how I want to navigate and guide the influence with the type of hosting experience I want to have.

Much to look forward to!

Lucky!

The two weeks since I've been home have been very fast pace! Within the first few days I got my taxes done and a bike. A few days later, I got a job and my tax return! I'm not going to stick with this current job, but the other job opportunities are coming up very quickly! I've been hanging out with my well missed friends! Life has been a blast in the last 2 weeks!

I'm only disappointed that I didn't get any of the job stuff that I want it done. The places that I wanted to work for all booked up by the time I got back home. On the other hand, it's for the best for me to be able to make and attend My Health Care appointments. I don't have to worry about too much job stuff all at once and make time to get my check ups. I didn't waste any time jumping back into my vitamins and supplements routine. I also start doing my stretches, but I have to be more on top of doing them at least every other day. I want to do stretches every day, but it's a matter of remembering to. I definitely do stretches before I go for bike rides! And I know to maintain the bike before at least every other ride, but ideally before every ride!

Something I'm concerned about is the sudden violent and hateful thoughts I had soon after returning home. Things I hadn't remembered for over 3 months suddenly started rushing back and I was angry about them all over again. Things that are all in past experiences that I still feel very seriously about, but I was surprised at how freshly angry I was about them. I don't know if this means I have anger issues, but I'm not willing to rule it out.

I spent a lot of my vacation one-handed, but since I've been home and put on my wrist brace my hand has been feeling better. I'm still going to talk about it with my nurse practitioner, though. I'm also getting a new therapist! I'm really discouraged about going to the dentist since I have to go to the university now, but I know I should go... it's just frustrating to have to deal with the university. It would be great if I could go back to my previous Clinic.

Not having a menstrual cycle is great! I recently knowledge that I had major dysphoria around my menstruation, but not just to myself. This time I acknowledged it to a group of people and it makes more sense every time I say it and it's refreshing that other people know about it now. I will be continuing Depo shots for the foreseeable future.

Even though things didn't go exactly like I wanted them to with the employment situation, things went exactly as they needed to for everything else to work out. I'm satisfied with the way things are for now, and looking forward to the Great Wave of change that is coming up with the housemates in the near future!

That's all for now!

My neck

With fall comes a lot of change! My life has a lot of change. Jobs, friends, and all. I'm looking for a new place to stay because my roommates are very boring and lackluster about life. My emotions are also scary to them, though I haven't done anything scary. I can really live without them, but I don't work to my ass off for a $700 place by myself in the inner city. I actually like having roommates. This is the first place I've been with people I dislike, and it's the same place I've ever paid for on my own. I wonder what that's suppose to tell me. I might resume camping come summer, because I don't hang out with wimps. Selfish wimps, to make it worse. I'm aiming for jobs that pay a little more than what I'm making now, and hopefully everything will work out, so I can have a higher budget for rent. I'm way to in love with my life for these people.

At the sametime, my health is taking a serious turn. There's a high chance my neck is going to need some kind of surgery, due to a lump that has been on my thyroid for months. It's soft, not pained, and  moveable, so hopefully it's just weird fat. If it's fat, it can stay - that's not knife or drain worthy.

We'll see how things go. I'm 28, now. I'm too old for this shit.