pumpkin spice forklift driver!

I've been getting my basic bitch on with pumpkin spice latte mix and pumpkin spice hot cocoa mix! I have a very happy sugar and carbs filled belly! every now and then I very briefly care about having a flat stomach, but pumpkin spice and chai lattes are too good! I would rather be proud of my flawed body. And I'm starting to think abs look good on other people but maybe not so much on me.

I've always cared more about being strong than looking good anyway. I'm going to start exercising more in the future, hopefully. I have a very long stretched out plan for how I'm going to do this:

First I'm going to do the warehouse training and equipment operations training at a local program. Then I'm going to get a job at one of these warehouses that usually pays almost $20 an hour depending on the position. And then I'm going to get the gym membership and have lyft money! And then I will be buff as fuck! I do enjoy working out and exercising a general. I don't much care for watching what I eat and stuff like that. but I will say that when I have a normal exercise routine, I am more drawn towards healthier foods and less alcoholic behavior then otherwise. But the chai lattes aren't going anywhere!

I've been hanging out and partying hard very recently. Friends birthdays all piled up in one month. A very spooky month! And I do have Halloween plans. It's not a party, but a friend and I are going to go around and look at people's Halloween decorations! And we're going to go to another friend's house and watch scary movies!

Back to the warehouse stuff. The workshop and I'm going to is going to specifically teach me how to drive a forklift, scissor lift, Boom Lift, bobcat, and I'm going to get OSHA training. And the other workshop is going to teach me how to drive an excavator, a toolcat, and teach me computer basics. the flyer more specifically says computer self service is training. I have no idea what that means. It's probably a manager skill or something. I'm hoping I don't have to do the OSHA training twice, as both of the programs have the same 10 hours of OSHA training. 

Not only will whatever job I get with this help me come all my basic needs, but it'll be really tight if I could treat all of my friends did something spectacular on New year's day! And treat someone out to dinner and lunch on Valentine's day. And commissioned some more artist to draw my characters! And get the LG Stylo 5, because I'm officially sick of the Motorola E5 plus! But I do still like Virgin Mobile so I'm going to keep them. There's so much stuff I can do with enough money, and working in a warehouse I know I'll make it least $14 an hour. for what I'll be training in, I think that my maximum starting wage is $19 an hour in this area. 14 is the very least that I need, and 19 be more than enough! 

it's always a matter of getting a job that I like with a company I can stick with, where my co-workers aren't absolute garbage trash beings. and I know that warehouse settings is full of toxic masculinity and stuff like that, but I know the pen is mightier than the sword and I don't take any shit! one more queer black person on the team, and one less toxic heterosexual cisgender bro!

I'm looking forward to the future! Despite the near future being very cold!

False offers

Finding a job is hard. Finding a job that has long-term potential is harder. But makes everything harder than people don't have respect for your time and give false job offers that they will follow up on or just saying don't give your job to get your attention.

Lucky!

The two weeks since I've been home have been very fast pace! Within the first few days I got my taxes done and a bike. A few days later, I got a job and my tax return! I'm not going to stick with this current job, but the other job opportunities are coming up very quickly! I've been hanging out with my well missed friends! Life has been a blast in the last 2 weeks!

I'm only disappointed that I didn't get any of the job stuff that I want it done. The places that I wanted to work for all booked up by the time I got back home. On the other hand, it's for the best for me to be able to make and attend My Health Care appointments. I don't have to worry about too much job stuff all at once and make time to get my check ups. I didn't waste any time jumping back into my vitamins and supplements routine. I also start doing my stretches, but I have to be more on top of doing them at least every other day. I want to do stretches every day, but it's a matter of remembering to. I definitely do stretches before I go for bike rides! And I know to maintain the bike before at least every other ride, but ideally before every ride!

Something I'm concerned about is the sudden violent and hateful thoughts I had soon after returning home. Things I hadn't remembered for over 3 months suddenly started rushing back and I was angry about them all over again. Things that are all in past experiences that I still feel very seriously about, but I was surprised at how freshly angry I was about them. I don't know if this means I have anger issues, but I'm not willing to rule it out.

I spent a lot of my vacation one-handed, but since I've been home and put on my wrist brace my hand has been feeling better. I'm still going to talk about it with my nurse practitioner, though. I'm also getting a new therapist! I'm really discouraged about going to the dentist since I have to go to the university now, but I know I should go... it's just frustrating to have to deal with the university. It would be great if I could go back to my previous Clinic.

Not having a menstrual cycle is great! I recently knowledge that I had major dysphoria around my menstruation, but not just to myself. This time I acknowledged it to a group of people and it makes more sense every time I say it and it's refreshing that other people know about it now. I will be continuing Depo shots for the foreseeable future.

Even though things didn't go exactly like I wanted them to with the employment situation, things went exactly as they needed to for everything else to work out. I'm satisfied with the way things are for now, and looking forward to the Great Wave of change that is coming up with the housemates in the near future!

That's all for now!