Saturday, July 01, 2017

A letter to my teenage self

A letter to my teenage self

Howdy,

How are you feeling? Really focus on that, because how you're feeling is important.  It always has been, and it always will be. How you feel goes past a lot of how you think and what you believe, so it's very important.

Your feelings are going to lead you to very different places and to very different people, so continue to trust them. When you feel like you should go, go. When you feel like you should stop, stop. If someone is being hurtful towards you leave them be. It's easier with people outside, than people in family, but that doesn't mean you're stuck with them either. Nothing is permenat, and this isn't you for the rest of your life.

It's better to focus on being yourself than to consign to being "normal" or "different". Those things really don't matter, because everyone has their own different meaning for what those things mean.

There are millions of billions of people on the plante. You're not normal or different, and you're not alone. It just feels like it because, right now, access to all those people is so limited.

Even in depress you will seek being social so you and others won't feel alone and that's ok. Whatever you do to be ok is ok.

You're going to talk to a lot of people and read a lot about people. Somehow, there will still be a sence of "normal" and "different". That's because now you have your own bubble, and you are aware that's it's there. The bubble is now still what you have learned from the people around you, but as you learn other things it will become your own. It's only as big or small as you make it. Whatever is in it is what you put in it.

Being yourself is going to hurt because you're going to be labeled "different", but keep being yourself. You're going to learn from what's happened and it will make you a better person. You will get the help you need to cope with everything in later days. Of coruse, not as soon as you want, but if you don't give up you'll get what you need.

You're going through a lot more than anyone should have to go through just to leave, but you have to go through it now because they're more to come. What you're going through now is somewhat safe, even though it doesn't feel like it. What's happening is in a much more controlled eneviornment, but things do change when you become an adult.

You don't have to die if you don't want to. You can continue to live, if you choose.

Where you are now is where you need to be, because it effects where you will go. It doesn't totally determinate it, but it effects it. Only you make to deicisions. If you choose to live, you choose to accept the changes that you'll go through. And, things will change very dramatically in all sorts of directions. It may not seem like it's worth it, and I know there's nothing I can do to convience you, but I can tell you that it's very worth it.

People are going to tell you that the world is a harash place, but the world that they are in and the world you are in are different worlds. Their world is a harash place because they made it that way for themselves. That doesn't have to be your world, if you don't want it to be. And, you don't so it won't.

You'll always have friends, and people that will be there for you. They won't always be the people that you think they will be or you think they should be. They'll help you in a lot of different ways. They will help you continue to live, if you let them.

You must learn the consequses of only being half commited to honesty. You will go through your own version of hell, but it will be still in a controlled enviornment. You won't feel that safe, but you're in the best position to learn that lesson before adulthood. It will make you very scared, but you would be scare forever, because you're too awesome to be stopped!

Everything will be what it needs to be for you at the time, and then you will move on from it and things will change. You'll change, but only if you choose to live.

Brush your teeth more, and keep Iodine in your diet. Those are also very important!













Don't focus on being different or normal. Just be yourself, no matter how much it hurts. Because, really, their's no one else left to be. Everyone else is taken.

(I intentionally didn't fix the typos.)

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